Sunday, November 14, 2010


Did I mention how hard it is to write every day?

This weekend was crazy. Started out awesome.. great Friday, beautiful weather, etc., etc. Things were going my way. The universe seemed to like me. I was looking ahead to a scheduled, but not so busy weekend. I should have recognized the trap.

I scheduled our Holiday picture photo shoot early this year, like this weekend. I was very proud of myself, calling to get the appointment at the time close to what I wanted at one of the studios close to where we live (versus the 25 minute drive to the mall in the 'burbs). It was all set. I knew what we were all wearing, told the husband, everything was a go.

Saturday morning comes. We are all tired, but in good spirits. Got dressed as if we're going to a Christmas ball and head over to the studio. "We have a breakdown," my husband tells me as I step out of the elevator (we took separate cars due to more of my brilliant planning to get Jackie home for her nap on time). I was perplexed. A breakdown? What could have happened?

"We have you down for tomorrow morning," the manager says. TOMORROW? WHAT? The Universe had turned its back on me.

Come to find out either someone told me the wrong day or my mind played a trick on me once again and I THOUGHT she said Saturday, but it was indeed Sunday. There was no place to fit us in, no cancellations. Oh, one while we were standing there, but at noon. No can do.

Both mornings of my weekend were basically screwed now. I would miss running one of those days due to this craziness not to mention attempting to sleep in. Plus, we were risking Jackie being in a bad mood the next day. I wish I hadn't thought it.

We get thru Saturday, have a good date night (but not such a good movie) and do it all over again Sunday morning--same outfits and all.

I was ready for a good shoot; tried to put things in perspective that we were doing this WAY early so we'd have December to relax, or at least not rush.. or at least not have something else to do.

Ended up the photographer that I was promised wasn't that great. This "manager-type person" supposedly got promoted from the other studio because she was so great. Really? I know it's early on a Sunday and I know your other manager gave me a $50 credit for the problems yesterday, but can you have some personality for my daughter? How about not making me do all the work to get her to smile. I thought we were paying YOU to do that job. Oh, and how about having props that weren't damaged so the pictures would look somewhat professional?

Thankfully we got a few good shots so we could make our Holiday cards elsewhere, but they basically lost over $100 from us due to all these issues. Look, I take responsibility that I may have, probably, made the mistake about the day, but there's no excuse for a child photographer to not have a personality and to make our session not-so-fun.

Luckily that was our last session of our membership so we really made out well on the package, along with the credit I received, but this is why I did NOT want to go to this studio. I should have gone with my gut.

The good news? Our holiday cards are ordered and should be here in a week. I wonder if I'll beat my record of getting our cards out before December 1?

Either way, is that a good excuse on why I didn't write over the past couple days? It should be :)

Thursday, November 11, 2010

Roller Coaster

Wow. I was just in the best mood! Finally got outside, sun was shining (now it's pitch black 1 hour later), and I was about to get a ton of stuff done.. then.. the dreaded text that DH has to stay late and I have a commitment before he's expected home.

I was going to post this for how I'm feeling.

Now it's this.

HAHA! Have fun!!

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Shoulda, Coulda, Woulda

Written by who knows but this is great!

"Too many people put off something that brings them joy just because they
haven't thought about it, don't have it on their schedule, didn't know it
was coming or are too rigid to depart from their routine.

I got to thinking one day about all those people on the Titanic who
passed up dessert at dinner that fateful night in an effort to cut back.
From then on, I've tried to be a little more flexible.

How many women out there will eat at home because their husband didn't
suggest going out to dinner until after something had been thawed? Does
the word 'refrigeration' mean nothing to you?

How often have your kids dropped in to talk and sat in silence while you
watched 'Jeopardy' on television?

I cannot count the times I called my sister and said , 'How about going
to lunch in a half hour?' She would gas up and stammer, 'I can't. I have
clothes on the line. My hair is dirty. I wish I had known yesterday, I
had a late breakfast, It looks like rain' And my personal favorite: 'It's
Monday.' She died a few years ago. We never did have lunch together.

Because Americans cram so much into their lives, we tend to schedule our
headaches. We live on a sparse diet of promises we make to ourselves
when all the conditions are perfect!

We'll go back and visit the grandparents when we get Steve
toilet-trained. We'll entertain when we replace the living-room carpet.
We'll go on a second honeymoon when we get two more kids out of college.

Life has a way of accelerating as we get older. The days get shorter, and
the list of promises to ourselves gets longer. One morning, we awaken,
and all we have to show for our lives is a litany of 'I'm going to,' 'I
plan on,' and 'Someday’ when things are settled down a bit.'

When anyone calls my 'seize the moment' friend, she is open to adventure
and available for trips. She keeps an open mind on new ideas. Her
enthusiasm for life is contagious. You talk with her for five minutes,
and you're ready to trade your bad feet for a pair of Rollerblades and
skip an elevator for a bungee cord.

My lips have not touched ice cream in 10 years. I love ice cream. It's
just that I might as well apply it directly to my stomach with a spatula
and eliminate the digestive process. The other day, I stopped the car and
bought a triple-dip. If my car had hit an iceberg on the way home, I
would have died happy.

Now...go on and have a nice day. Do something you WANT to...not something
on your SHOULD DO list. If you were going to die soon and had only one
phone call you could make, who would you call and what would you say? And
why are you waiting?

Have you ever watched kids playing on a merry go round or listened to the
rain lapping on the ground? Ever followed a butterfly's erratic flight or
gazed at the sun into the fading night? Do you run through each day on
the fly? When you ask 'How are you?' Do you hear the reply?

When the day is done, do you lie in your bed with the next hundred chores
running through your head? Ever told your child, 'We'll do it tomorrow.'
And in your haste, not see his sorrow? Ever lost touch? Let a good
friendship die? Just call to say 'Hi'?

When you worry and hurry through your day, it is like an unopened
gift....Thrown away.... Life is not a race. Take it slower. Hear the
music before the song is over."

To those who are reading this, I cherish our connection and appreciate
all you do. We have some history together.

'Life may not be the party we hoped for... but while we are here we might
as well dance!'

Monday, November 8, 2010

An Open Letter to...

Me and Dane Cook, November 6, 2010

I considered posting my letter/email that I wrote to Dane Cook early this morning, but within the next moment I decided not to. It's a personal letter and one that he only should read. I will post my thoughts on why I wrote the letter below.. enjoy :)

I find it amazing how shows and people (artists, comedians) affect me. I've seen Dane six times over the years and met him three. Each performance I take away something different. This past weekend the show we enjoyed at Mohegan Sun in CT was one of the best I'd seen. As I wrote to him, I still can't put my finger on why it was that way, but whatever it was, he killed, the crowd loved it and I was back in love with his comedy again.

It didn't hurt that I got to chat with him afterward and give him my personal congrats. He's a great guy, that Dane Cook. He gets a lot of flack about his comedy. I am never sure why. Many people literally hate it--and him. I think a lot of people think he sold out or just uses his looks to rake in fans and fill seats, but in all honesty, if he wasn't good, no one would show up. I know many good looking and charismatic musicians.. you don't see all of them filling arenas every night due to their good looks.

His comedy is different, I guess you could say. He's a storyteller. I happen to like that. I love a lot of different types of comedy from the snip-its of Mitch Hedburg or Steven Wright, to the storytelling of Bill Cosby and Dane Cook. Either way, I give him a lot of props.

The guy works hard. You can't take that away from him and he's humble. I think that's why I love him so much. Not only for his comedy and how he tells it, but for who he is as a person. There's not many people in this world who I consider inspiring--he is one of them. As I was reflecting last night on the handful of people that do inspire me, all of them are quite different. Different ways of being, different careers, but all have many of the same qualities. They are authentic, risk takers and never give up. Most are humble in their ways, passionate about what they do, and in turn, tend to inspire so many other people by who they are. These are people you just want to be around all the time. I'm actually having "withdrawals" two days after the fact as I'm just "hungry" for that energy. That feeling of being totally accepted by a person, loved, listened to.. being in the presence of someone who is present. It's so awesome.

Being with him and some of the other folks the other night reminded me that I want to be that type of person. I'm always fairly hard on myself so who knows? I may be that for some now, but I feel I have a ways to go. I'm definitely feeling the urge to start something new, to find my calling and to re-find the things that truly light me up. Many of those things have been gone, missing, for some time and it's time to get them back.

I will say publicly that I still have a dream to work with Dane on a professional basis. There was a point a few years ago where I was actively pursuing this. I was working with some folks regarding my resume and writing a letter to him to introduce myself not as a fan, but as a person he'd be interested in working with. Nothing ever happened with all that (as in a job), but after I spoke with him Saturday night, all that came flooding back. One small issue is that he's in LA and I'm in Boston with a family, but odder things have happened.

2010 has been some year. I was thinking about that in the car just a few minutes ago and realized, although some of it was rough, my husband, my daughter and I really had an amazing 2010. I wouldn't have guessed that I'd start the year dancing in negative temps on a rooftop in Minneapolis. I also wouldn't have guessed that my husband and I would spend a three day weekend without our daughter at a music festival in Austin, and I definitely wouldn't have guessed I'd be seeing Dane and Al backstage last Saturday, all with huge hugs and fun conversations. I WANT more of that type of stuff. Surprises that come out of no where and hug you.. not the one's that knock you down, but a quick surprise and hug is nice.

I still have a month and a half to create what I want, not only for 2011, but for the rest of this year! I can dream all I want, but action is what will make it happen.. onward and upward, as they say.. here we go.

Sunday, November 7, 2010


No I'm not talking about the show, I'm talking about what I'm filled with :)

I missed writing again yesterday. I was proud of myself on many levels, but totally forgot to write. I was able to get a bit of sleep as my little one is still recouping a bit from her MMR shot. Poor kid. I think I will call her doc tomorrow just to check to see if this excessive sleeping is normal. Or I could just enjoy it and move on :)

I got a 4 mile run in (training for a 10K now) yesterday morning and then got ready to head to CT. Why CT? Well, one of my favorite comics, or two of them, were playing at Mohegan Sun arena last night, Dane Cook and Al Del Bene. I've followed these guys since 2001 and it's been a blast watching them evolve. It also doesn't hurt that I get the VIP treatment just about every time I see them and it's even better when Al is on tour with Dane :) Because I know Al from the small venue level, he's really good to me. I can honestly say that I'm his #1 fan. He will attest to that. Over the years, I've gotten people to listen to his stuff, started fan pages and all that stuff. He's very appreciative. Due to all that, he was able to get my friend and I back stage and it was a blast. I love seeing him and Dane also now knows me by name and it's such an honor. We got to hug, chat, laugh.. just an amazing night.

I will post pics later as I didn't get to upload them yet, but wanted to get this note in before I left.. heading to an in-store performance of a past-local-Boston-musician-now-turned-LA-musician, Bleu. I love knowing these guys for years.. makes me feel oh so important :)

Thursday, November 4, 2010


That seems to be the word of the day most days the past few weeks. I've avoided writing, or really put it off, because I've had so much to say and wanted to have the time to write. But as it always happens, I'm either not in the mood, don't have time, am tired, or something comes up. Today seemed like a good day. It's raining, I have some time at home with the little one and I'm feeling energized. Could be that me and that kid slept thru my alarm for this morning's nap so we got 2.5 hours rest. Feels like old times :)

Not sure how much I'm going to write, but there have been a few things on my mind. Mostly, I'm still feeling regrets about Halloween 2010. The weekend itself was fairly busy. I had a nice pasta dinner Friday night at "Bab's" house as I was running my first 5K on Saturday. The run happened in the morning, then went to brunch and just had some downtime at home on Saturday. We were planning on going to something Halloween-y that night, but I was so exhausted from all the training and the actual run that we put it off. Sunday, Halloween, came.. and went. My DH went to the Vikings/Patriots game and was gone all day. I had already said that we weren't going to dress Jackie up that day and trick or treat as she's still too small and I didn't want to end up eating all the candy. In the end, Jackie and I spent time with our wonderful friends (who just happen to be neighbors) and handed out candy to the kids. That night, I had remorse and was really bummed out, mostly because I realized we didn't do much for my favorite holiday or showed Jackie some cool stuff.

Halloween 2009 was great. I was in a few groups with Jackie so I had three outfits for her over that week. It was a blast and I thought that was the start of some fun Halloweens with her over the years. Why this year turned out the way it did, I'm really not sure. I know there were several times I chose not to do things (carve a pumpkin, paint pumpkins, go see the lit pumpkin exhibit in RI, watch the movie "Halloween," etc.), but I didn't think about the repercussions on me emotionally. In all honesty, I had been focused on my race on the 30th and seeing that there was a costume contest scheduled on that day, I thought that would do it. Little did I  know, we weren't able to find out much about it, even when we got to the Y (where the race was held) and so nothing really happened there (other than dressing her up and taking some pictures).

With all that being said, I did reflect and realized something. Now that I'm getting older, but mostly now that I have a kid, most things only happen once. Although I can look ahead and assume there would be another Halloween, why wouldn't I just take what is in front of me now and enjoy it?

I've also been thinking a lot about my age and not putting things off. It's actually good as it's forced us (my family) to do things we may put off "for a better day." I also realized that my husband and I had a habit of putting fun things off a lot even before Jackie was born. We've dated for 10 years (married 7) and we never did the type traveling I wanted to do, didn't go skiing outside of the East Coast like I wanted to do, and a number of other things. As with most couples, we were focused on the next day, month or year.. we were trying to have a baby for about 4 of those years, but it still would have been great if we took on those things so there were no regrets.

Although we can do those things now, obviously it's a bit more complicated and expensive. The best I can do currently is learn from all this and move on. The biggest thing, though, is to be responsible with my sleep, as I know when I get enough I can plow thru anything and actually enjoy it :)

I guess it's time to accept what's so, move on from Halloween 2010 and enjoy the days ahead. For example, we have Thanksgiving plans at one of my best buds house and that should be a lot of fun. We've spent a number of Thanksgiving's with just us so this will be a nice change.

Moving on also means finding (or re-finding) things that I enjoy. It's been put off for way too long. I tend to get reminded of a "talk" from a very powerful leader when I have issues with relationships and regrets. He said to us: "How many of you have relationship issues?" For those in the room it was about 75% of us. He just smiled and said: "Then you don't have big enough problems."

I think it's time to create some big "problems" and find the joy in those for a while. The rest of 2010 and 2011 will be about finding joy and fulfillment in the things that I miss dearly: playing music, dancing, laughing and sun! :) And who knows, there may be some politics thrown in there too :)

Here's to no regrets!!